Shoes, Slippers and Warm, Clean Floors
by smoking-tulips
Summary: Scandinavian Nation are neat freaks...England finds them terribly confusing because of this.  3 short drabbles featuring the Nordics and England
1. Chapter 1

_A.N This is rather cracky...I have a fever/cold and I'm bored - apologies in advance_

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"take off yer shoes"

England gives Denmark a confused look as he stands there in the hallway, trying to hang his coat up.

"what?"

"I said: take off yer damn shoes…you'll get my floors dirty"

England is confused, but does as he's told – he never figured the tall Nordic nation as a neat freak (bloody hell, he's still getting over the fact that Netherlands has as much of an OCD about cleanliness as Germany)

However, he gives it no more though and their meeting continues on as it should.

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_A.N: "Take your shoes off" a rule very widely practiced in Scandinavia (any Danes or Swedes, feel free to back me up or prove me wrong...I only really know Norway's rules...but I've been told it's universal in Scandinavia XD )_


	2. Chapter 2

_A.N: Read on and I'll explain why the hell my brain was inspired to write such silly stuff_

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Norway is giving him a look he hasn't seen in years – angry.

England tries his best to think of the reason for why the Nordic nation seems so angry.

All he did was walk through the front door when Norway invited him inside…

"Ya know what England…yer as thick as America."

England turns around to see Denmark standing in the doorway together with Sweden.

"I beg your pardon!"

Denmark just grins and enters the house, Sweden has his usual intimidating look on, but he mutters an almost inaudible "M'st run 'n th' f'mily" as he too steps over the threshold of Norway's door.

The two larger Nordics shrug of their coats and remove their boots before continuing further into the hallway. Sweden compliments Norway on his clean floor. The shorter Nordic mumbles something in his own language England can only presume is a 'thank you'.

'Oh bollocks' is all England can think as he looks down to his own feet – still wearing dirty boots, standing on Norway very newly cleaner parquet floor.

In a great hurry he removes them and places them on the shoe rack close to the door – honesty, what is wrong with these nations? Walking around in only your socks is not just cold and unpleasant – it means you're being far too familiar and invasive on the host! (And frankly, Norway washes his floors far to often it seems – it can't be good for the wooden floor at all)

England grumpily makes his way into the living room. Denmark and Sweden are seated in the sofa both wearing some grey felt like slippers…Norway is wearing the exact same kind. Finland must have arrived earlier than all of them, happily sipping a large mug of something warm – he too is wearing slippers…

The only thing separating the 4 pairs are the various colours the slippers are lined with.

England can't help but wonder if the two Nordics bought their slippers with them…or if Norway provided them.

He decided its best not to dwell on it.

When Iceland shows up half an hour later, England is none the wiser as to where the slippers come from – or why Norway hates people walking indoor with shoes on…

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A.N:

_Right... Inspired by a conversation with my Scottish grandmother. Scandinavians are rather clean. Norwegians (as far as she's concerned) clean their floors so often it's silly (my mother included). And the whole "take your shoes off" is a very Scandinavian rule. While builders/electricians/plumbers and even guests in Britain will happily waltz into your home wearing dirty work boots and shoes, in Norway they'll immediately take them off (I've been told they do the same in Sweden and Denmark, but I've never asked any Swedes or Danes about that, so it's only an assumption really)_

_One British friend even told me that taking your shoes off, without asking, in Britain means you're making yourself at home - and that could be considered rather rude..._

_As for the whole 'slippers thing'…well, that might just be my family. We all wear slippers – when my grandfather comes to our house he either brings a pair of his own indoor shoes or slipper with him, or uses some old ones my dad used to wear. It's not uncommon to arrive in one pair of shoes, then change into other ones the second you arrive at the person's house._


	3. Chapter 3

_A.N: More silly stuff...enjoy~~_

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Scandinavian winters always feel a lot colder than any winter weather he gets back home.

Yet if a meeting is held at Sweden's house – you still have to show up.

For once – England remembers to remove his shoes the second he comes in the door.

This seems to please the Nordic nations present a lot more than he feels it should – bloody neat freaks the lot of them.

He glances down to his feet – completely soaking wet from threading through all that snow. Sweden gives him a look that England interprets as: 'you've made my floors wet, you bastard', however, a helpful Finland nudges Sweden a bit, making the taller Nordic snap out of his thinking.

"Y'can dry y'r socks in the b'throom"

"I'll find you some spares ones in the meantime!" Finland happily chirps in before rapidly disappearing somewhere upstairs. Unbeknown to the English man, Sweden was actually feeling sorry for the British man – not anger.

Finland returns only second later with a pair of woolly, knitted socks and ushers England towards the bathroom.

"Wouldn't the wash room be better to dry clothes in?"

Finland smiles and just shakes his head

"No, no, Mr England! The bathroom floor is perfect for drying stuff"

The floor is what? This is madness…A bathroom floor is not good for drying – it's not even warm! Even if there is a carpet, it will not help dry his socks.

Finland turns a dial on the wall outside the bathroom before turning on the light and stepping inside. A large navy blue coat, England recognises as Norway's, is lying sprawled on the floor – it too is soaking wet. The second England steps onto the bathroom floor he realises why this is the place to dry stuff – the floor is warm!

Well that's certainly much better than carpets…

He carefully puts his socks down on the warm floor. No wonder Denmark always seems to fall asleep in Norway or Sweden's bathroom whenever they have a party – the spiky haired Nordic is like a cat at times – always looking for a nice warm spot to sleep.

England heads back to join the rest of the nations – mentally writing a note to himself to see if he can get such nice warm flooring…it would mean he'd save money on replacing his bathroom carpet every 10 years or so…

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_A.N: Carpet in your bathroom...as far as I'm concerned, only the British (possibly some Americans, I forget) do this. I know it's no longer fashionable, but a lot of older houses still have wall-to-wall carpets in their bathroom. Frankly, it's disgusting. And while I see the reason behind it (cold tiles in the morning are no fun) it really creeps me out. My student flat in Scotland has a capret in the bathrooms, and ewwww! Bugs live in it - no matter how much we clean/vacuum the damn thing._

_In Scandinavia (read: Norway - as I don't think I have the right to talk on my neighbours behalf XD ) heated bathroom floors are very popular and common. I don't know about anyone who does not have heating in their bathroom floor.  
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_I know several people who will leave their wet/damp clothes hanging in the bathroom or lying on the warm floor, to dry. It's also nice to leave your clothes over night on the floor so in the morning their nice and warm XD (STFU Britain, I know you can do the same with radiators, but it's still not as nice)_

_and I am guilty of sleeping in bathrooms. my friend has the best bathroom ever, and we did once just all bring sleeping bags into it and stayed there for a good few hours - almost hugging the warm floor XD_

_So yeah...I really shouldn't write when drugged up on cold and flu medicine...I'm sorry_

_And I fail at Sweden's speech...I'll eventually get the hang of it  
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_XD_


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